Life is funny.

I woke up late for work. As in supposed to be there and clocked in within 6 minutes. But I didn’t panic. I called who needed called. I got ready and got to work. Normally, I’m sick when that happens every few years…

For the first time since I moved into my new office space at work, I actually enjoyed the view. I used to not have any windows for 5 years but now I have huge windows surrounding my desk. And I’ve always quietly despised the extra light. But I sat back in my chair this afternoon and enjoyed looking out the windows.

I planned out all these new scheduled changes I was going to begin doing when it came to my content.

I haven’t created anything. And I’m fine with that.

I finished reading one of the Diary Of A Wimpy Kid books with Aaliyah.

I got the dishes done. I don’t know why but having an empty sink does wonders for my soul.

I was on Threads.

I ate hot dogs with mustard and onions for dinner. I got rid of some things in the fridge.

I spent 30+ minutes getting a splinter out of my finger.

And I just feel very lucky. Even as I sit here when I should be asleep in bed.

I don’t know where the late night energy comes from. This could also be a column idea.

Today was a good day and now it’s the day of my wedding anniversary.

Our 10th.

We leave for Mexico Saturday morning.

I’m letting myself start to get excited.

Talk soon.

First and foremost, thank you to anyone who took the time to read my last blog entry. I’m not going to apologize for it. I know it’s not my normal light-hearted fare, but it was necessary for me to be as transparent in that moment as possible.

Daylight savings and I just did not agree this year. But those thoughts I was having was valid. Just know that I’m feeling much better now.

I’m in Charleston, WV for Aaliyah’s state gymnastics meet. Last one of her season and last one until November. I love watching her compete. I could do better about being more engaged at her practices but I don’t want to miss any of her routines when they count.

Did I sound like Iverson a little bit with the practice thing?

I just crushed the continental breakfast in the hotel. I’m a sucker for a waffle maker.

I took my cornrows out on Thursday. I love the way they look but it felt so good be able to scratch my head again. I’m probably going to have Sam shave off the sides and the back in a few weeks and keep the top. I’ll get Dionne to braid me again around July. I think I’ll enjoy having braids on top much more than the full head of braids.

But damn did I look good.

We’re pulling up to WV State now. Reminds me of that time I came with Steve, Ed, and Vince down here for a weekend.

And that was a weekend.

We should be headed back to Morgantown sometime today. I plan on working on video content and writing some new stuff. I did well with video this last week but my writer fingers are itchy.

That sounded gross, didn’t it?

I woke up Monday and felt like I needed a social media break.

Instead, I turned on my camera and told everyone I could feel a bout of depression coming on.

Tuesday, I turned on the camera to say that I wanted the snow to be gone for the winter and that I was feeling better.

This morning, I turned on the camera to say that I was officially depressed. Family and friends have reached out and I reassured them it was just seasonal depression.

Dad challenged me to a Michael Jackson dance battle?

Did I make a mistake broadcasting to the world on 4 different social media platforms that I’m depressed? I don’t know. Was it a cry for help? I don’t think so. It was just a weird experiment to be able to look back and see the depression hit me in real time?

I don’t know.

My friend Tobias passed away suddenly last week. We used to write together back in my fanfiction days and stayed in contact ever since. A bunch of us who used to write together hopped on Skype Saturday night to a reunion in his honor. We’re going to try to make it a regular thing.

TC was a good dude.

I shot a video on Sunday. I shot a video on my lunch. The video from Sunday I couldn’t use because I was rapping without the music and I was rapping too fast. The video from today had some kind of weird rumbling in it, probably because I had just restarted my car and the phone was propped on my steering wheel. Plus, I was talking about music I like to listen to when I’m depressed.

It felt very exploitive.

I was going to cook after I picked up the Walmart order. But I didn’t and now I have no desire.

I think sleep is for the best.

I specifically recorded Hyphen Nation last night so I would have my next two nights open.

Angel’s out of town until Friday which means I have a few hours after Aaliyah goes to bed tonight and tomorrow. I kept telling myself that I would attempt to record tonight and stream tomorrow.

And I pretty much made the decision 20 minutes ago to go to bed.

I’m exhausted. I was on meetings for 5 of my 8 hours today but I’m tapped out. I came home, jumped on the trampoline (I forgot about that), made dinner, read, and then watched the Proud Family Disney+ series until it was bedtime.

I could be recording a new song but instead I’m blogging.

Why can’t Aquarians be good at just one thing?

Sidenote: I did edit a vertical clip from Hyphen Nation 205 though.

I have been writing more. It’s been nice to let my imagination run wild a little bit but it’s nothing that I feel is good enough to share. It’s a step in the right direction though.

The next episode of Hyphen Nation will be for those who were with me from the start. Like Lam. I’m excited.

I got my first Deluxe Turkey & Bacon from Primanti’s today.

F*ck.

New go-to.

I woke up at 5 on Christmas day and had a very good morning. Then I took a really good nap. And dad’s power came back on in Capon Bridge. I watched Home Alone 2 and The Grinch Who Stole Christmas and I finished A Christmas Story Christmas and I went to bed.

I wrote a verse and a hook too.

Today, I woke up and felt off. I went to the grocery store for pancake mix. I came home and made Aaliyah a smoothie. I washed sheets. I got depressed thinking about my mom and why I’ve never attempted to make gravy from scratch before.

It was because I used to help her make gravy from scratch. And then I used too much salt.

Then I found out my cousin died and one of the last times I saw him was the night mom passed. And now I hope and pray that he gets to see her again.

Then I felt sad and defeated so I took a nap on the bedroom floor while the girls watched Wednesday. I took a shower and visited with Brandi when she came over. Then, I made some new videos.

I also went down a Mac Miller rabbit hole on TikTok and that didn’t help.

Now, Aaliyah’s falling asleep so I’m going to get up and relax the rest of the night.

It’s a miracle we even try to get out of bed sometimes.

The important part is that we try.